How to Deal with Disappointment Part I: A Series of Blows
Everyone celebrates success, but few discuss disappointment. But let’s face it, a creative life is a series of rejections from ideas, pitches, to open calls.
In this three-part article, I will start by opening up about my bitter experiences (Part I), then provide practical tips to overcome disappointment (Part II) and conclude with inspiring stories of resilience from successful people (Part III).
Fichtean Curve: A storytelling structure consists of crisis after crisis, climax, and then resolution
Over the last several months, I have had a series of disappointments. In fact, I’ve accidentally been living the Fichtean curve: A storytelling structure which consists of crisis after crisis, climax, and then resolution.
Here is what happened —
First Crisis
On social media, I saw ‘everyone’ getting Arts Council DYCP grants. I thought, “Surely I can get one too.” To nail my application, I even invested a bit of money in a workshop. Long story short, what I thought was a pretty watertight application was rejected.
This can’t be right because ‘everyone’ is successfully getting the grants. To make sure my application is even more watertight for the second time around, I consulted a lovely bid writer to strengthen my application. Surely this time, I’ll get it. But I received another disappointing letter:
“Your application was not successful mainly because other applications were preferred.”
Not…awfully…helpful. But here is a helpful stat to give us some perspective. Only 18% of eligible applicants are successful. That’s hardly ‘everyone’. Lesson learnt—social media distorts our view of reality.
Second Crisis
Bathroom renovation gone wrong: Forced to Live without a shower for 60 days
Amidst this, our bathroom renovation was going terribly wrong. We were let down by the supplier, the material order was not placed on time, and the builders abandoned the site midway—leaving us without a working bathroom for nearly 60 days.
Being worried and absent-minded, I was pickpocketed while walking on Oxford Street.
The anxiety level was high, not knowing when we would get the bathroom back with an unreliable and dishonest supplier. Being worried and absent-minded, I was pickpocketed while walking on Oxford Street, ending up having to cancel all my cards.
Third Crisis
To cheer myself up, I applied for an artist-scientist collaboration open call. Having collaborated with neuroscientist Dr Tara Swart on ITV, I thought I had a good chance. But I didn’t get the opportunity, despite being shortlisted.
Climax & Resolution
Totally devastated, but as an artist with a mission to spread optimism, I decided to view this negative experience as a learning opportunity.
It’s okay to feel bitter as long as you channel the emotion into drive and action.
My view is that it’s okay to feel bitter as long as you channel the emotion into drive and action. This series of blows has made me more determined than ever to succeed.
So, what is my gain from this experience?
Renewed determination to succeed
A painting collection concept about resilience and progress (coming soon)
An opportunity to share my experience and connect with people like you who are reading this
Not all bad!
In part II, I’ll share 5 practical tips for overcoming disappointment. If you’re keen to learn more and stay optimistic, sign up for my newsletter.
You can also follow my journey in real-time on:
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Can we collaborate?
I’m June aka MAMIMU, an artist/lecturer on a mission to spread optimism. If you share the same vision and want to make the world a better place through public art, product collaboration, workshops, or anything else, let's talk.
Together, we can amplify our impact and create a brighter future for all.